Self Worth and The Confidence That Goes With It

Being 'confident' with yourself and who you are is a term that is often thrown around a bit too lightly in my opinion. It is all very well for a celebrity to say 'being confident with myself is the most important thing that helped me rise to fame.' Well, it's very easy to say that when you're sitting on a bank balance made of millions, but it is a bit trickier than that. Being a teenager myself, I know how much we look up to celebrities that are slightly different, take Kim Kardashian or Rebel Wilson. Both of whom are not your stereotypical size 0 celebrities who claim never to diet or exercise. Lets be real, they all do.

Although Kim K has done some very unsavoury things in her past (haven't we all to some extent?) I know as someone who possesses similar physical characteristics to her, that she has certainly helped me to bypass some very difficult times in my life. When I initially started up this blog, I realised how much I love to write. Not to analyse literature so much, but to be provided with the freedom to say what I please however, ever since I started to post my blog on my twitter or facebook or instagram, I started to receive a lot of nasty messages through both comments on my blog and messages on my account which I originally created for all of you to use! In the past, rude messages have hit me hard and although it is extremely easy to say that they don't affect me and I don't care, I do. You would not believe the things that people are willing to say simply because they can say it anonymously. There was even a time where I disabled anonymous commenting on my blog, simply to remove those hateful messages. Anyways, I now have moderation set up on my blog comments and have removed my account as I guess I've learnt not to trust the internet. 

Now, back to Kim Kardashian. I am obviously not the size of some fashion bloggers out there as seen in my OOTD posts, but neither am I the size of some of the 'curvy' bloggers out there; however I float somewhere in the middle. Being raised in Asia, a country where I am at least a foot taller than the average female, it is hard not to be judged and compared with their petite frame. As a result, I have been called fat, obese and have even had people ask me if highstreet stores stock my size. You can imagine how difficult that is. I can tell you now that I have been on almost every single BMI calculator on the internet and I am not considered overweight and obviously highstreet stores stock my size. In fact, my size is sometimes out of stock because it is such a popular size amongst Britons. The reality is, although I know that I am not fat or anything along those lines, I know how hard it is when your friends are wearing size 2's, it doesn't matter that they are only 5'4. Well basically, Kim K has helped me overcome my constant comparison to my friends as even though she is 5'4, we share the same measurements! 

This rambling post was actually incredibly difficult to write, all joking aside, simply because I am putting myself out there completely. In front of the internet, in front of all my 'friends' who know my blog address and in front of those who are so blinded with jealousy that they will do anything to bring me down. All this post is trying to say that it is always good to focus on the positives and make sure you know exactly who you are in your mind, I know it is easy to say, but honestly. As soon as I established my own sense of style, realised that I was not obese and finally got to grips that people do actually have different body frames, I was able to pursue what I love to do and that is writing. 

It's still not easy, it is still tough, I do still get horrible comments but I'm not complaining, all they have helped me to do is realise who my real friends are and come to grips with who I really am, truly. 

So what I'm really trying to say is that we are all so beautiful and we all go through confidence issues and we all struggle. None of this should take away from the fact that actually everyone is so beautiful. I have never looked at a smiling face and thought that someone is ugly, no matter how much you are tormented, no matter how many people call you names, there are thousands of people out there who think differently. Do NOT let a bunch of high school girls who have nothing better to do, cause you to flake out and resort to harmful measures. Don't let them bring you down. It's really not worth it.